STI: Can you find it in you?

Aug 26, 2004

Can you find it in you?
by Chua Mui Hoong

ABORTION has been on my mind of late.

No, it's not what you think.

But reading the letters on abortion, and recalling stories of people I know who aborted their babies, got me into this frame of mind.

The Forum page has seen several letters on the issue.

It was sparked off by a letter from Mr Teo Chun Sang, who wanted abortion laws changed to allow parents to abort foetuses after 24 weeks if they knew the baby would be disabled.

Mr Felix Ser, who has cerebral palsy, wrote in to counter this suggestion, in indignation.

'It is gross injustice if we deny babies with disabilities the opportunity to live beyond the womb by emphasising parental choice,' he said.

Mr Ser's point: There are different degrees of disability, and many 'disabled' people can still contribute to society.

The debate came home to me when someone I know decided to have an abortion because there was a chance the baby would have congenital defects.

I once heard of another woman who aborted her baby after finding out that it had both male and female sexual organs.

And then there are those who aborted their baby because they got pregnant while unmarried, or simply because a baby would cramp their style.

Now, I know it's not an easy decision. Women who have aborted once often feel guilty and have nightmares about it long after.

My concern is whether Singapore society is too lax on abortion: When we make it such a simple option, it becomes the default choice.

In some ways, the calculations are so easy: To a young woman looking ahead, a short, 15-minute procedure is simpler to go through than a lifetime of raising a child, especially a child who might be disabled in some way.

But that calculation ignores what abortion means: the aborting of a life.

Leave aside the question of whether life begins at Day 7 or Day 14 after conception. Any woman who has seen an ultrasound of her baby in her womb knows she has a life growing within her.

Aborting means putting a stop to that life growing in her.

I think mature women understand the implications of that decision. I hope teenagers and young unwed mothers also feel the weight of their decision.

Each year, over 12,000 babies are aborted. With Singapore experiencing a baby shortage, there have been calls to 'save' more of these babies.

National issues aside, there are human reasons for trying to keep the numbers down.

I know abortion is framed as a matter of a woman's choice.

In the United States, the debate is polarised between the catchphrases pro-choice or pro-life.

Many women I know are sympathetic to both sides of the debate.

Which is why the decision on whether to go ahead with a pregnancy that could lead to having a disabled baby, is such a wrenching one.

I don't want to judge women who choose to abort rather than risk having a disabled child.

Neither do I want to judge women who choose to abort simply because they feel it's their body, and their choice.

I just want to ask them two questions.

One: Abortion is your choice, but how about what the baby wants? After all, who will protect your baby's right to life, if not you?

Two: Even if you don't want the baby, can you find it in you to love the baby enough to give him or her a chance at life? Carry the child to full term, and then, if you still cannot raise him yourself, put him up for adoption.

At least give him a chance at life.